Wednesday, November 26, 2008

mirror, mirror on the wall

I am just sitting here watching an episode of "The Drs" and seeing the results of an Ultimate Makeover. Not a simple hair and make-up make-over. Oh no -- we're talking the whole kit'n'kaboodle -- breasts, teeth, chin, nose...e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g.

The reason this woman (probably in her early 40's) wanted this make-over was because she was uncomfortable with how she looked; she had been teased since childhood for some of her unattractive features and still, as a grown woman, feels like 'the black sheep' no matter where she goes.

The before & after pictures were unbelievable. She went from being uncomfortable with her less-than-perfect features to being absolutely beautiful. The kind of woman any man would be proud to have on his arm.

And I am left feeling torn.

On one hand, I am happy for her that she is now content with how she looks and can maybe start to re-build her obviously shredded self-esteem.

But I am also left feeling uncomfortable with the whole situation.

This woman now looks nothing like the woman God created her to be. You would never in a million years see any similarities between the before & after. She will have to get new photo ID's and some people (those who don't know her very well, that is) will even have a hard time believing that she is who she says she is. Her own mother, I'm sure, wouldn't recognize her if she saw her walking on the street.

Bottom line: she isn't herself anymore.

Now, if somebody was badly scarred in a fire or something -- that would be different, in my opinion. But just because you're not satisfied with how you look? I'm not sure about that one.

So, my question is, where do we draw the line? Should we all get surgeries to make ourselves look like someone we're not, just so we can feel pretty? Or should we learn to be content with how God made us?


Sheila said...

I didn't watch that episode, but I've seen similar makeovers, and I have the same feelings!

PS. Dont'cha love that show!?!

Kelly said...

I feel the same way you do. I have a really hard time with plastic surgery just for the sake of looks. I honestly don't know how people do it. I think I would feel more uncomfortable looking like a good someone else than a not so perfect me.

Kathy and Carl said...

I think maybe we need to fix all the people that hounded her based just on her looks. Maybe they (and our society) needs a view make-over. That way, no matter the skin you're in, you feel beautiful.

andrea said...

i just wish that people could see their beauty and feel loved by their Creator. I really believe that if those considering procedures, would look beyond themselves and volunteer and pour their hearts into others, they would feel more beautiful...and the sad part is that others would see their heart and inner beauty and not any physical flaws. i believe self-conscious people (myself included)are completely too into themselves and need to focus on God and others for a true perspective of beauty.
that's my take! i feel so sorry for those who believe this will make them feel better...they may look great but their new chin will not age the same time as one's face...that'll just make them more self-conscious than they are now...great thought-provoking post!

Kellan said...

I don't know - I am also torn with this question. I sure hate the jowls I am getting on my jaw line but can't imagine ever really having anything done to fix it!

Great post, Andrea - Kellan

PamJ said...

That's a great post Andrea! I really have to agree with others when they say that it is the other people who need to change and see her for who she really was on the inside (of course BEFORE her major overhaul surgery...)
So when she gets old and wrinkly and 'unrecognizable' again, will she go in for a 'tune up'??? I wouldn't recognize my grandparents when they were my age, but it doesn't make me want to bully them about it...
It's too bad it took that to make her feel better in her own shoes...

Louise said...

Yeah something about changing the entire way that we look just doesn't sit well with me, I mean don't get me wrong there are days when I would like lipo and new breasts but I've learned to try and make peace with my thighs and post nursing breasts and love the person God made me to be!!
Great post!!

melanie said...

I feel very torn about this. I can see your point. At the same time I think about what a mess my teeth were before my parents got braces for me as a teenager. It did wonders for my self esteem to not have to try to hide my teeth. While that is not the same thing as what this lady did- it did change my apperance- and did change how God created me.

I know that is VERY different than what you are talking about. There is a line somewhere that was certainly crossed. I'm just not sure where that line is.

Rebecca said...

I feel torn after seeing those kinds of shows too. I wonder how they are doing years after the makeover? The old cliche "beauty is only skin deep" comes to mind. Sure, they look great but do they FEEL different? After having the ugly duckling/black sheep feelings for so many years does it go away when the bandages come off? To be honest I've thought about plastic surgery before. Not in the realistic 'we can afford this' kind of way but in the 'what if I could' kind of way. One thing I thought about was I wouldn't look like myself in photos from all those years before surgery. Wedding photos & family photos...I'd look like someone else. My biggest hang up is what would I tell my children, esp my daughter. "You're pretty just as you are but mommy wasn't so I had surgery" and what would she think when people told her she used to look like mommy, you know BEFORE the surgery. I look a lot like my mom did & she didn't have very high self esteem - that really had an affect on me, esp in my teen years.

TammyIsBlessed said...

There's definitely a line there somewhere - it's just hard to know exactly where it is.

I know I'm totally fine with people getting braces, lasik eye surgery - stuff like that.

And I'm not fine with looking like a completely different person.

It's that middle area that's so gray.

I agree with Rebecca that we need to be very careful about the image and message we're sending to our children - both daughters (for how they view themselves) and sons (for how they view women).

common mom said...

Content. Plastic surgery for the sake of vanity? KAPOOEY! No matter what this woman looks like now, she's still the same person with the same personality. Sure, you feel good when you look good . . . but can it really change your entire outlook on life? I would hate to think that all those people were suddenly interested in me because of the way I looked, rather than who I am.

No plastic surgery in this girl's future, that's for sure!