Saturday, October 31, 2009

maybe i shouldn't have asked...

If you had a unique baby name picked out for your soon-to-be-born child, but just weren't quite sure if it was a good name -- would you ask people for their opinions? Or would you just decide on your own and go with it? If you asked for people's opinions and you got only negative feedback, then what? What if you still sorta liked it; would you still name your baby that, knowing that people gave it the thumbs down? Or would you ditch it and look for a different option?

See, if you just decided to go with it without asking people their opinions, you might never know what they really thought about it. Sure, they'd likely talk about it to other people ("I can't believe they named their baby that") -- but I think hearing a name after a baby is born can make a difference on someone's reaction to a particular name. Somehow having a little person actually going together with that name can make it more appealing, even if just hearing the name on its own would've otherwised caused you to make a face.

No, we are not tossing around baby name ideas or anything. I'm just using that scenario as a comparison for the real topic of today's post.

Last week I went shopping with a dear friend of mine, and I celebrated my 30+ pound weight loss with buying a few new tops. One of them was a bit of a different style, and as much as I loved the shirt, I was unsure if it was really flattering -- or if it in fact was the complete opposite. So after giving it some thought, I decided to post a picture of it on good ol' Facebook and ask for people's opinions.

Of course I was expecting some mixed opinions -- but as it turns out, only a few short minutes later I removed the picture as I had enough negative responses (and only negative responses) to make me almost embarrassed that I had even considered the possibility of it being a good shirt for me. Don't get me wrong -- I was glad for people's comments, as I really did want to know how it looked on me before I decided to rip the tags off -- but I was hoping for even one positive remark just to make me feel better.

With all of that feedback, you would think I would promptly pack the shirt up and return it. But even though there is obviously something about it that caused me to have doubts about it in the first place -- there is also something about it that really makes me want to keep it. But now how do I actually keep it knowing the things that were said about it?

If I would never have asked, I could've made the decision to keep it and then worn it with confidence. Nobody would've told me that it wasn't a good shirt for me. Sure, they might talk about it behing my back ("I can't believe she bought that shirt...it's really not flattering on her"), but maybe seeing me in it in real life, without just a picture to go on, would make them turn out liking it more. But then again, maybe not.

Sigh....maybe I just shouldn't have asked...


(But since I know you'd all be asking to see a picture of it anyway, I'll suck it up and post some. Here are 2 from slightly different angles.)


10 comments:

Gin said...

I showed your post to Wes and asked him what he thought. His comment was "It looks nice!" That's high praise from him. I think the color is good on you and I like the way it sits on your hips. Thumbs up from our household!

Margo said...

No way!! That is almost identical to a shirt I bought this fall. I actually wore it to the Rempel Thanksgiving gathering. That felt like such a whirlwind with us arriving just in time to eat that I hardly saw you, and you may not remember it, but I really like it. I have NO idea if it's flattering on me either, but it's just plain fun to wear. I say if you enjoy it, wear it with pride!

Andrea said...

Thanks, ladies! I'm starting to feel much better about it already!

And Margo -- since we don't have twin jeans anymore, it makes sense that we have stumbled across twin shirts! :)

Roo said...

i love it that you asked and that your gonna keep it anyway. that makes me smile! xo i really like the shirt but i like your heart even more.

andrea said...

i like it! it is realy cute and super fun! it's flowy yet tighter at the bottom...showing off those curves...strut you stuff...go girl! you look great!

Margo said...

I actually think we should go jean shopping together and maybe we can show up as twins at the next family gathering :)

andrea said...

...actually reminded me of a long time ago, i told several friends that I wasn't a huge fan of the name Morgan ( before and after they told me their short list...oops!)...well, it grew on me so much that i named our daughter that 5 years later.

Melissa said...

I hope I didn't hurt your feelings when I said I didn't care for it(if I did please forgive me)- I think everyone has individual style/taste and its awesome that you are confident enough in yourself to stand firm in what you like and what makes you feel good, no matter what other people opinions were. I am sure people comment on my wardrobe! I think your are gorgeous, and your clothes just enhance that darling!

jackie said...

too funny! a while back i bought that EXACT shirt, from smart set, right? i did end up returning it, but only because i realized i already had another shirt almost the same. i like it on you! that's my new fav shirt style! i have quit a few of shirts that style. i think they're cool! wear it with pride!

jackie said...

too funny! a while back i bought that EXACT shirt, from smart set, right? i did end up returning it, but only because i realized i already had another shirt almost the same. i like it on you! that's my new fav shirt style! i have quit a few of shirts that style. i think they're cool! wear it with pride!